I Missed This

Achoo! This is a dusty forgotten place.


I used to post about my girls all the time, and while their antics will always be perfectly amusing and charming to me, I realize the world-at-large isn't really interested in their strange little quirks or their latest accomplishments. I already have a forum for that - it's called Facebook, and my friends are free to hide my posts and I will never know.


Now this space is more for me - each day I am faced with issues both little and small. I realize that I face the problems of the very fortunate. You know, where I agonize over which shoe to wear when there are children without shoes. Or more recently, my overblown dismay at the complete lack of girls' track pants with ankle zippers in the clearance racks where I shop. I know this is a problem of a privileged life. That's me, limited by my bourgeois existence.


But that doesn't mean the track pants situation doesn't annoy the crap out of me. When Emily was in first grade (two years ago), her teacher pulled me aside and asked me if I had considered putting her in basketball. Do you know me? Have you seen my girls? Tiny little things. They aren't the absolute smallest in their classes, but they are petite.


So no, I hadn't even considered it. But all of a sudden, I thought why not? I had not been athletic. Throughout my childhood, my parents always told me it was acceptable to be awful at PE. They expected me to be awkward and physically weak. I should save my energies for important things like piano and spelling bees and Chinese school. Oh yeah, represent!  I lived the stereotype. So why shouldn't I just measure up to their expectations?


But now I look at my little girls and the world is brim-full of possibility. Her teacher flipped a switch for me, and I realized I would be shortchanging my girls unless I let them try things that may be outside of my own comfort zone. I thought what the hell - and we jumped into the life of athletic endeavors.  I want my girls to approach their life choices with the question "Why not?".


Emily tried the more girl-friendly choices - dance, gymnastics, and ice-skating. She simply did not enjoy them. I think she was uncomfortable with the performance element. So far, my kindergartner Rory does tend to enjoy those activities.  I may end up with a daughter who is going to love prancing around on a stage in glittery outfits.


So in the last two years, we've kept Emily occupied in team sports. She's played on a co-ed team for basketball and an all girls team for softball. Here's where I get upset.


It's really hard to find good athletic wear for my girls - especially my basketball playing third-grader. The sweatpants being sold are mostly sparkly and bejeweled. Decorative clothing, but not intended for real rugged play. Because it's cold outside, I wanted to get her those track pants with the little zippers around the ankles. Ideally she can remove the pants while wearing shorts underneath, and I wouldn't have to wrestle with her high tops. I can sometimes find some in the boys' section, but they are never sized for petite 8 year old girls or they are outrageously expensive. I have never NEVER seen any sold as girls' athletic wear. Not even online. Some of the athletic gear companies will be a little more savvy, and market them as Kidswear. But for the most part, all of the truly athletic gear will have the word Boys stamped all over the labels. As for shorts, the girls' shorts tend to be either sparkly (again) or very very hoochie-short. And SHOES! Basketball shoes for girls in brick-and-mortar shops are non-existent. (In larger sizes, there are styles available - but in true children's sizing at the ages these kids are first introduced to these sports, in sizes 10-13 - nothing.)  I can only purchase them online. Emily is great, she'll wear the boys' high-tops without complaint, but she is ultimately a girly-girl and loves her some pink and purple.


I realize that retailers stock their establishments by demand (I've taken marketing and economics classes!). Either there aren't enough girls playing sports at their age, or the retailers need to stop selling the mini-hoochie-mama wear and provide wearable girls athletic clothing. I don't think the current marketplace truly reflects the modern culture. Emily's closest friends are girls who play sports. They are competitive and athletic. But they are eight years old and self-conscious and impressionable too. So whatever they see is available to other girls, that's what they think they want. I think what they really want is something different. Fine. I want something different for them. I admit it.